What Shapes Identity?

Across all of the students' experiences, four major themes describe how Asian American college students make sense of their racial identities in times of heightened anti-Asian racism.

Categorization & Labels

Hypervisibility

Relationships & Resources

Relationship to Blackness

Categorization, Labels, & Identity

Language is one tool to make sense of reality. Labels and the ability to reject and reimagine those labels are important for how Asian American college students made sense of their racial identities. Labels, like "Asian American," can create solidarity, but also ignore the diversity within a population, harming subpopulations and inaccurately portraying a homogenous racial experience. The dominant meanings of racial and ethnic labels often conflicted with students' lived experiences, showing how established identity categories can limit self-expression and sensemaking. Explore the tabs to learn more about how students described their own identities.

"I'm Indian American but..."

During COVID-19, Aditi acknowledged that they were “not the one receiving those kinds of attacks” that targeted East Asian or Chinese-looking people but was still categorized as an “Asian in America.” This pan-ethnic grouping created inner tension for Aditi who recognized distinctions between various groups that are considered in that label. Instead of “Asian American,” Aditi shared that “I guess I would use the term ‘Indian American’ instead but then some people still think that Indians equals Native Americans which like that’s a whole ’nother thing.” Given Western history that has conflated people from India with Indigenous people in the Americas, Aditi’s desire to use a label that more accurately reflects their background is tainted by the legacy of settlers in the U.S.

"I identify in between the two."

Mira does not call herself “completely Asian.” Between “Asian” and “Asian American,” she “just identifies kind of in between the two because there is a lot of aspects of me that are still culturally Asian, and then there’s other aspects that are definitely more ‘Americanized’.” Mira’s self-labeling does not fit neatly into any one term. She recognized that the labels she placed herself in between each carry their own distinct meanings that are laden with assumptions about culture and place. “Asian” assumes particular traditions, language, or experiences that are specific to “Asia,” while “Asian American” contains an element of being “Americanized” that sits in a dichotomous relationship to “Asia.” Mira’s liminal space of identification does not have a simple word to encapsulate it, revealing the limits of language to fully describe Asian American identities.

"I'm adopted Chinese"

Macy's identity has “always been ‘I’m adopted Chinese’ not just like ‘I’m Chinese’ because then if I just say, ‘I’m Chinese,’ people expect me to know things and I’m like oh no no no no no no. My parents are white.” In regard to being adopted and Chinese, Macy “always kept them together” because of how distinct her experience as a transracial adoptee was compared to Chinese people who are not adopted. Her experiences were not like other Chinese people she knew, and she did not identify with Chinese culture or the label. Moreover, Macy’s comment on how “people expect [her] to know things” indicates how others anticipated her to have cultural knowledge or experiences based on her stated ethnicity alone, which did not match her lived experiences.

Hypervisibility

Hypervisible anti-Asian racism during the COVID-19 pandemic spurred participants’ engagement with their racial identities in ways that revealed the multiple ways Asians are oppressed in U.S. society. Asian American college students in this study experienced threats of physical violence, racist rhetoric, and discrimination based on their multiple, intersectional identities. Explore the tabs to learn more about how students experienced hypervisibility.

During the pandemic, East and Southeast Asian participants experienced instances of “more overt racism than [they’d] ever experienced before” (Mira), contributing to a heightened sense of being seen as Asian. Students felt threatened during the early 2020s given the prevalence of physical violence against Asian Americans.

“It’s not like you don’t want me in this country. You don’t want me on this Earth. It wasn’t xenophobia. It was like, I want you dead.” -Macy

“I felt panicky every time I went outside...seeing a lot of stuff in the media and in the news about a lot of the Asian hate crimes was really troubling.” -Ava

“Another student approached me at the library, mocking me with pictures of those stereotypical Asians in straw hats...I was flabbergasted. I didn't expect that!” -Alan

Widespread perceptions of Asians as dangerous and blameworthy for the pandemic conflicted with participants’ existing self-perceptions and conceptions of Asian Americans. Students recognized that U.S. society framed them as threats and viruses, which contrasted the common stereotype of Asian Americans as overachievers and model minorities.

“People are attacking people who look Asian. I look Asian. Therefore, no one sees me as an Asian American anymore. They see me as like, ‘you are a vector for COVID.’” -Mira

“The pandemic burst the bubble of Asian people, since they are doing well for themselves and are this sort of higher up minority, they don’t experience racism as bad.” -Raj

“Racism in the U.S. has always been there…but with Trump’s presidency and his vitriol, it made people feel like it was okay to express those ideas again and be outright blatantly racist and sexist and homophobic.” -Alan

While experiences of racial discrimination and marginalization were present throughout their lives, participants understood their racial oppression through their interlocking experiences of gender and immigration status. Intersectionality informed students’ sensemaking of racism and exposed additional dimensions of domination that are present in the lives of Asian American college students.

“Growing up female, it was ingrained in me to always be worried about my safety and be hypervigilant. Now I have two targets on my back instead of just the one” -Macy

“2020 was the first time that I felt scared to be an Asian American…I felt that way because I’m a woman, but I’ve never felt that way before about my race.” -Evelyn

“As an international student, I am not afforded the respect or dignity that someone who is from here is…Like if I wanted to go work at Starbucks, I can’t. That’s just the rules they’ve made.” -Raj

Relationships & Resources

Relationships, such as those with faculty, staff, friends, and peer acquaintances, helped students make sense of their identities in times of heightened anti-Asian racism. Coursework or learning experiences that foster a greater sense of oneself, including courses and school projects that focus on race, were also catalysts to students' racial identity journeys. These relationships and resources provided participants with humanizing knowledge, validation, and reciprocity that supported their identity development. Explore the tabs to learn more about how these resources and relationships supported students in their journeys.

Coursework and educational experiences helped participants expand their knowledge about race and reflect on their identities. Ethnic studies courses, school projects, books, and online media focused on race helped students recognize their own experiences within historical and systemic contexts.

“Sociology gave me the language, academic backing, and knowledge to rationalize logically to myself like why I should be considered a minority.” -Evelyn

“My project helped me ground myself a lot in my identity, being Vietnamese American, to be able to know history, and being able to understand why there are Vietnamese people here at all.” -Naomi

“The current racism is an ongoing reminder of the relevant Asian American experiences and…histories of representation, war, migration, legality, and anti-Asian violence.” -Vam

University faculty and staff supported students in their racial identity journeys when their interactions validated students’ labor and lived experiences. Conversely, faculty and staff who were dismissive of students' experiences or maintained inaccurate narratives about people of color harmed students in ways that created hostile learning environments.

“I took a law class that was taught by this Chinese professor who’s from China…someone who’s not white, speaks with an accent, and all of that… [It showed me that] there’s room in this system for someone like me.” -Krishna

“[The assistant director helped me understand that] being an adoptee is still a valid experience and it's just as valid as anyone else who has a more like 'typical' growing up experience of being second generation Asian American.” -Jo

“That faculty member made me feel very little or like I didn’t belong,” and “just saw me as someone who helped pay their salary.”” -Ava

Relationships with friends and peers on campus were helpful to participants as they navigated adversity and personal struggles during times of heightened anti-Asian racism. Participants felt supported by peers with similar identities as well as those with different ones, and they often felt a sense of solidarity with them.

“During the pandemic, people were finding such a hard time to connect with people and be together and be present...I needed to foster genuine connection and reciprocal relationships.” -Vam

“After the Atlanta shooting, my sister, my roommate and I shared a lot of the anger and sadness together.” -Ava

“In a queer BIPOC space, it was freeing to just like be around that energy... I could just be myself and like not worry about it.” -Naomi

Relationship to Blackness

Asian American students’ negotiations with and exposure to Blackness informed how they understood their own racial oppression and actions towards liberation. The social context of the early 2020s included the Black Lives Matter movement and the murder of George Floyd in Minnesota. Students observed both racism and solidarity between Asian and Black groups in the U.S., attempting to make sense of the racial violence impacting both groups. This includes experiences based on socioeconomic class and cross-racial hostility and solidarity. Explore the tabs to learn more about how students navigated cross-racial dynamics.

Students related to Blackness differently based on parental income levels, parental educational attainment, and the demographics of where they grew up. Students with lower income and schooling levels drew on their lived experiences with poverty and lower-income communities to inform their engagement with Blackness, whereas students with higher income and schooling levels related to Blackness through their learnings about Black history during this period.

“Typically low-income folks, folks who come from scarce backgrounds and neighborhoods… were racialized in relation to Black and Brown folks versus being racialized in a proximity to whiteness and to wealth.” -Vam

“I grew up with a lot of white people, and so I think I have felt closer to white people than other minorities throughout my life. And so, I feel distant from other minorities.” -Evelyn

“In a white person’s eyes, I’m the closest thing to being white. So, like my Black counterparts, my Hispanic counterparts, they definitely experienced worse things than I did.” -Ava

Students experienced challenges with their families and community members who struggled to understand the anti-Black and anti-Asian racism occurring in the early 2020s. These conflicts often left students feeling angry, despite feelings of responsibility to educate their own community members.

“It would be my job to educate the people around me…to tell my mother and have her understand about what is happening and why it’s important for her to understand what’s happening.’” -Naomi

“It was so tiring to have to keep explaining why being a social justice advocate is not just for the people that look like you. It's for all the other people who are also not being heard.” -Ava

“A lot of the crime and harm that has been caused has been from Asian Americans, from Black and Brown communities as well. And Indigenous communities and vice versa.” -Vam

Although students faced various expressions of cross-racial hostility during this time, they also embraced the power of cross-racial solidarity to inform their own identities as Asian Americans. Participants who recognized experiences of domination across groups were able to see their liberations as interconnected.

“Asian Americans should be helping the other minorities make progress to fight that [racism].”” -Alan

“There are similar stories across cultures too because it’s still having to fight and claw at having a chance to live your life and to be seen as a person and to survive.” -Naomi

“Black studies is Black folk trying to make meaning and trying to breathe life into Blackness...I took those lessons and tried to put that into my own Asian American identity.” -Vam

Students identified a dimension of relative “privilege” that they felt Asian Americans had in comparison to other racially minoritized groups as a result of the model minority myth. While students acknowledged that this stereotype was problematic, especially when weaponized against other groups, the racialized perception of them as “better” minorities shaped how they viewed their own Asian American identities.

“As an Asian American person, I do have more privilege in the sense that that model minority myth is set out there to make me look better.” -Ava

“It seems like, yes, we’ve reached the top of the ladder in some ways…Instead of weaponizing that against those below us, maybe we should be trying to help everybody get to the top.” -Raj

“The extreme level of cruelty and violence paired with the solidarity all across the country…made me think about myself in a way where I have this privilege that obviously other people don’t have, especially Black, darker skinned individuals.” -Macy